Guerilla Journalism #3: The Tough Questions

Posted: June 27, 2011 in Uncategorized

Last week’s guerilla journalism experiment was a huge mistake. Stewart, The World’s Second Smartest Gorilla knows nothing about conducting interviews. And almost nothing about politics. I took things back into my own hands. I was lucky to get a good random subject this time, somebody who replied to my Facebook interview request pretty damn quickly. Meet Constance Ann  Fitzgerald. Her responses are in bold. My questions are not. This week is all about shaking things up.

Thank you for consenting to be interviewed. Here is your first question: What is your name and what do you do for a living?

My name is Constance Ann Fitzgerald, and I work in an “adult”/ smoke and sensuality shop.

Makes sense. Lots of people find smoking to be very sensual. And smoking is for adults. What’s your favorite prime number?

People are into all sorts of wacky things. 
I’d have to say 5

5, huh? That’s a good one. Third favorite Beatle?

I’d go with Paul. 1st being John, 2nd being Ringo.

Do you have any interests being with the letter M?

Many! Movies, Monsters, Monologues, Moon-shine, Mascara, Mysticism, and MUSIC MUSIC MUSIC!

Excellent. Any other interests that do not begin with the letter M?

Day drinking (It usually leads to an adventure or two), writing, bike rides, avoiding seagulls at the beach (they are some sandwich stealing bastards!), forcing other people to tell me stories on the spot, and more things that involve liquor, and getting interviewed for no apparent reason.

Noble pursuits all. Lastly, if you could ride any English Romantic Poet across a desert made of graham crackers, which one would it be

Hmmm… That’s a pretty tough one, but I’m going with Keats. If only because i feel that maybe the desert air might have done his TB some good. 
…I don’t have to share the graham crackers with him do I

No. Positively reinforcing his whining doesn’t do anyone any good. Thank you for your time, Constance and for these insights into the workings of your day-to-day life.


Next week, I will be selecting my random interviewee via Twitter and conducting the interview live through tweets. So, if you want a chance to be selected, follow me on Twitter. I’m @GarrettACook.

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